Working with an ex for the good of the kids

Working collaboratively with a former spouse may not be easy but is possible and is in the best interest of your children.

The challenges that people in Texas face when getting divorced can be magnified when minor children are involved. Certainly parents may well be concerned about the emotional impact of the divorce on their kids both during and after the divorce is finalized.

In addition, there is then a need for parents to figure out how to raise their children together when living separately. Commonly referred to as co-parenting , this is not always an easy thing for people to figure out how to do.

What can I do if I feel angry toward my ex?

MindBodyGreen suggests that parents who feel their emotions surge during conversations or communications with their former spouses essentially take a time out. Instead of responding with an answer to a question or a retort to a comment immediately, people should indicate that they need to think about the issue and ask for some time to do so. This allows them to let emotions simmer down on perhaps both sides and may well result in a more positive exchange.

Even if the children are not present during a conversation, the negative energy that can be cultivated can be felt by kids.

How should I communicate with my kids' other parent?

While there will no doubt be times when parents must see each other in person, technology does allow for them to keep some conversations out of these situations. Our Family Wizard is one company that offers an online tool via which divorced parents can send and receive messages, share calendars and more. This can be a valuable way of maintaining some objectivity and avoiding misunderstandings or heated exchanges that may happen during in-personal conversations.

What else can help me co-parent more effectively?

Stopping to think about the other parent's point of view is a good way to potentially head conflict off at the pass. There are always two sides to a situation and by trying to understand where the other person is coming from, it can help a parent to avoid unnecessarily vilifying the other person and, in so doing, prevent a conflict that is not necessary.

Finally, remembering that kids benefit when they have strong bonds with both parents is essential. Parents can help make this happen by avoiding negative commentary about or to each other in the children's presence.

How can I learn more about how to support my kids during a divorce?

Texas moms and dads should always work with an attorney when getting divorced. Among the benefits of this is the peace of mind that comes with knowing the logistics of their divorce are properly handled. This can allow parents the energy needed to focus on helping their children.